Dallas Clayton
SALUTE
SALUTE
Is it ever going to come to pass
that someone in a uniform
asking me to do something I don’t want to do
is ever going to make me feel good.
WHO MAKES THESE THINGS WE BUY
WHO MAKES THESE THINGS WE BUY
When I was too young to dress myself
my mom used to let me pick out my accessories
from the nature store at the mall
that sold crystals and magnetic rocks
and pins that looked like actual black widow spiders.
My favorite thing then was bolo ties,
the kind that fancy colonels from the civil war [...]
CRIMSON
CRIMSON
Hooray for old women
in the check out line
who dye their hair
those frightening shades of unnatural reds
the color of cough drop packages.
Not fooling anyone
just keeping up with the rituals
as if in these final years
it’s the hair that’s really going
catch people
and spin ‘em right around
on their asses.
HEARST
HEARST
It’s too bad
about the death of the newspaper.
There were so many things inside it
we never even got to understand.
UPGRADE
UPGRADE
You’ve been taking pictures
of the same subject for so long
switching film
cameras
computers
budgets
everything different
except the model.
CHAIN GANG
CHAIN GANG
Escaping from prison
in this day and age
is an amazing feat
and deserves, I feel,
at least some recognition
on the part of the justice system
if you are apprehended again
and returned to the slammer.
VOCABULARY
VOCABULARY
Whether I like it or not
when I die
most people will probably just say
“Bummer.”
CHEETAH JEFF
CHEETAH JEFF
My son
in the bathtub
asked for a story
and so I sat beside him
on the floor
and made up a tale
about a cheetah
named Jeff
who had self-confidence issues
because he wasn’t very fast.
As stories go,
I suspect mine was cribbed
from years of television,
tales of morality,
and sporting events
I’d watched in my youth
which always finished with the crowd going wild
and someone on [...]
SMALL
SMALL
Prize fighter
captain of industry
great and powerful ruler
remember
there was a day
not too far back
when someone
who loved you
washed you in a sink
just like an empty cereal bowl.
HOLY
HOLY
Even the most devout Christians
fear the day
that they might lose it
buy and old Airstream trailer
paint it up and down
with crooked drawings of jesus
and head out across the country
to preach the truckstop gospel
with no one but an old grey dog to keep them company.
PERSONALITY TEST
PERSONALITY TEST
If you really want to see who your friends are
you should have a birthday party
that requires climbing over a fence
to get there.
HUMAN RELATIONS
HUMAN RELATIONS
Certain people refer to this water
as the Persian Gulf
others the Arabian Gulf.
It is a topic of much regional debate.
To be clear
the Gulf itself
does not care what it is called
and continues to ebb and flow
at its own pace.
A COMPETITION BEGINS
A COMPETITION BEGINS
One day a man ate dinner
at a table
all alone
and thought
about trying to capture the world record
for wearing a beard made out of live bees.
Shortly thereafter
another man sat at a table
and decided to break that record.