AWARDS SEASON
AWARDS SEASON
One year, on the day they gave out the Oscars my roommate Kim and I decided to follow the hellicopters downtown to see what it looked like at the Oscars. We ended up outside the Shrine Auditorium, where all sorts of people were crowded around the red carpet and arriving limosines.
We walked around to the back of the building and climbed under some security barricades and ran up the side of a hill and into an alleyway behind the buidling. A photographer followed us as well, thinking that we might know of a back entrance that no one had ever thought to check. We climbed up the side of the buidling, then into a small door which led into a concrete maintainance tunnel.
I don’t know exactly what where we thought this tunnel would lead us or what we thought was going to happen if we made it into the building via the tunnel but I guess we all pictured some secret trap door that opened up onto the stage itself, where we could have popped up in the middle of a speech and waved to our parents and given the audience “the bird.”
As it turns out we crawled thirty yards into the tunnel with the photographers flashlight until we hit a padlocked door.
Then we crawled back out and back down the side of the building where a security officer was walking by.
He asked us what we were doing and we told him we were looking for my dad.
He said “what?”
And then we just started walking away.
He told us we couldn’t be there. And he asked for our licenses…
And I said we weren’t there, we were leaving and that he was just imagining we were there. And we hurried off into the crowd.
And I’m not sure, but as we were going I might have called him a fascist, because that sounds like something I would have said to the police when I was a teenager.